It happened again. I felt compelled to apologize to our boys for the way I acted. It is in such times that I am reminded of how important it is to live a life that matches the message.
Paul wrote: “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” (Eph. 6:4).
Bringing children up in the discipline & instruction (nurture & admonition) of the Lord begins with teaching the divine message (cf. Deut. 6:4-9) but continues by modeling and exemplifying that message in real life. Who listens to a hypocrite? Who believes the one who says one thing but does another?
I spend a good deal of time thinking about (and praying for God’s grace and wisdom) the danger of provoking our boys “to anger.” I want to avoid such an end with every fiber of my being. I’m certain you feel the same way about your family. May the Lord help us and bless us in this endeavor. With this in mind, we share the following article by David Shannon, president of Freed-Hardeman University.
—Bart
Things Fathers Do Which Provoke Children
by David Shannon
“Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged” (Col. 3:21).
Fathers, do you discourage or anger your children? The Scriptures clearly reveal God’s warning to fathers of the potential a father has to stir his children in ways which are wrong. How is this done? Recently, Glenda Franklin, a Christian counselor who is a member of our congregation, shared with me a list of things fathers do to discourage their children. She lists these from talking with children who were discouraged by their fathers. A father provokes when:
· He is disrespectful, critical, or unkind to his own parents.
· He is disrespectful and dishonoring to his wife.
· He criticizes their mother.
· He commits fornication.
· He uses money to buy what he wants instead of family needs.
· He is disrespectful to the children by criticizing, put downs, and blames.
· He ignores the child.
· He is disrespectful toward God, lacking proper priorities (i.e., tailgating on Sunday instead of worship).
· He disrespects those outside the family (friends, neighbors, etc.).
· He is an addict.
· He is sexually, physically, or verbally abusive.
